Apparently, the MOST IMPORTANT issue of our times!

Don’t look now, but something has rustled the Republicans out of their four-plus year hole. They are holding open, publicly broadcast Congressional hearings this week. Any guess what issue is so urgent, so monumental, that the GOP absolutely must hold hearings and bring it into the public debate?

Is it secret energy meetings between the Vice-President and corporations? No, they’re still hiding that information. Is it funding and executing the terrorist attacks of 9/11? No, that was the Democrats. Is it the administration’s lies about the Iraqi WMDs? No, that’s a non-issue. Is it about the lapdog media and its sugar-coating of all things Bush? Not a chance. Is it about the Bush plan to destroy social security? Nope. Did Janet Jackson uncover the other tit? Huh? Huh?

Then what the hell IS IT? What’s so important?

Baseball players on steroids.

Yep. The biggest issue of the day is how Major League baseball players have been ‘roiding up. Hey, if the MLB owners and players’ union don’t care enough to stop it, why the hell is Congress spending our money to worry about it?

Now, if the owners were forcing the drugs on the players, that would be different. But these are all willing participants. Sure, it hurts the integrity of the sport. But this is “do-what-it-takes” America. Results are all that matters. Nobody wants to pay to see nice guys hit a fly ball. They pay for home runs.

Nor is this about fraud. No ticket I ever bought promised drug-free players. All the league is selling is baseball entertainment. And home runs are about as entertaining as baseball gets.

The hypocrisy around these meetings is considerable. The GOP wants to pretend they’re concerned about something (without actually talking about anything that matters). The league wants to pretend it’s cracking down on steroid abuse, but isn’t interested in any measures that take these stars off the field (which risks lost games and lost sales). And the sports media wants to exploit this issue, and cry crocodile tears over “tainted” stats, but THEY are the ones making heroes out of these ‘roid users in the first place.

There are way too many people trying to have it both ways on this.